Resume Complete

I used to be a Broadway producer

I used to be a kennel man

I used to be a purveyor of hot chestnut cones

I used to hand out Kleenex at the kiosk

At lunch breaks, I caught squirrels for the tourists

I used to mumble as part of a classical chorus

I used to franchise child's toy weaponry

I used to model tic repellent

From time to time, I would get hired to work the Sultan's fan

I used to clean grout in WNBA stalls

I used to Twist in department store windows

I used to 'vogue' as a space android

Once I was nominated as candidate for Vice-President on a minor party ticket

I used to spill soup as part of paid party gags

I used to sit in on inter-corporate meetings pretending to be part of the other entourage

I used to be the least called-on Hollywood Square

Seasonally, I broke horses, put out fires, taught skiing, and played uke.